I see this in a lot of entries. I like it and I'm going to have a stab at it to see how many things about *me* I can write. **this is pretty difficult, I've been on number one for 2 minutes now**

1. I like rain a lot. 2 weeks of sunshine just about kills me.

2. I like to hike. I'm relentless when I know my destination and will not stop, now matter how heavy my pack is.

3. I was never sick and never on ANY medication until about a year ago.

4. When I was a teenager and my mom didn't like an outfit I was wearing, she told me I looked like hell.

5. My mom slapped me a lot.

6. I walked in on my parents having sex when I was 15. They didn't see me. Talk about a traumatic experience. Ew.

7. My now husband (whom I met at work) first had a crush on a person I was in training with. That was hard to get over. "You liked her first and I was the second choice" was all I thought about.

8. I feel I am not myself. I feel like I could be the person I really am if my mom were not around.

9. I love shampooing the carpet, mowing the lawn and mopping floors. I'm not sure what the theme is there.

10. I have a tattoo of a sun, moon and clouds on the inside of my right ankle.

11. When I was 16, my dad told me I would never straighten out.

12. I allow fear to hold me back.

13. I want my tongue pierced because I have control over the situation. Except for the fact that a dude would be shoving a 14 gauge needle through my tongue.

14. I was raised Lutheran, which is a close second, guilt-wise, to Catholic.

15. I judge people who are democrat as being bleeding hearts, even though I agree with a lot of democrat ideals. I think I may be a Green Party gal.

16. I hate....hate politics. I hate one party against another. Republicans and democrats are each very poor to one another. No one party is better than another. They both suck!

17. I was very saddened by the death of Ofra Haza. She was an inspiration and fought for what she believed in.

18. I can listen to Tori Amos over and over again and never get sick of any album now matter how many times played.

19. I didn't believe in memory repression until I saw a picture of my girls, ages 2 and 3, dressed up as witches for Halloween. I showed my mom the picture and asked her if she remembered this Halloween. She did. I asked who bought the costumes. Apparently I had. She said to remember I was going through my divorce at the time.

20. I was extremely unpopular during my school career. I wasn't a jerk. I was shy.

21. I purposely choose jobs that make me speak to people a lot.

22. It's easy for me to not reach out to people.

23. My husband was my focus during my labor with BooBoolicous. Without him, it would have been hell.

24. I wish I would have told more people to fuck off.

25. I had sex with a guy named Gade in his sleigh bed while listening to "Sweet Jane" by the Cowboy Junkies.

26. We live in a split level with shit-brown carpet.

27. I want to garden more.

28. I played french horn.

29. When I was estranged from my former husband, he kept bugging me for sex. I asked him if he thought I "owed" it to him. He said yes. I told him I didn't owe him anything and never would. He never asked me again.

30. I had a wonderful divorce attorney named Buz who taught me to stand up for myself and who was exceptional in the court room.

31. Spousal took me to see Tori Amos last time she was in Seattle.

32. I had a dog named Pepper and a cat named Muffin while growning up. Pepper protected Muffin and allowed her to beat up on him.

33. I am a redhead.

34. I am negative and make a conscious effort to change that.

35. I sometimes look in the mirror and say "You are the shit!" In America, this is a positive thing. I say it to be funny but at the same time, to up my self esteem.

36. After kids I have a hard time with my bladder.

37. I became vegan to see if it would help my health. It hasn't, but I won't go back to eating meat/diary.

38. My sister-in-law and I trade babysitting.

39. My brother and I always got along.

40. I had one grandparent growing up.

41. I love antiques.

42. I don't like Billy Bob Thornton because he doesn't like antiques.

43. I have never liked Tom Cruise.

44. I am attracted to some females. I know and have always known I couldn't have a relationship with a female.

45. I talk to homeless people.

46. I am deathly afraid of the dark.

47. I am depressed my doctor is leaving for New York.

48. I have a hard time with confrontation.

49. I write better than I talk. I don't think that's saying much.

50. I had a friend who got a DUI. I watched her daughter 3 nights a week for 12 weeks while my friend completed her alcohol classes. She followed through and it was cool.

51. I do things for certain people (like said friend in number 50) knowing full well I won't get anything in return.

52. I feel like I have to constantly be *good* at *something* in order to be worth anything.

53. I fully believe in reincarnation.

54. I do not understand why people worship Jesus, the Holy Ghost and God when it's said they are all one.

55. I read a book called "Many Lives, Many Masters." and it changed my whole view on religion.

56. I don't know what I'm good at.

57. I constantly change the radio station in the car.

58. I didn't go to my 10 high school reunion because I forgot about it. I was camping at an SCA event.

59. Like Margaret Cho, I have given a lot of unneccesary head.

60. Whining girls make me want to scream.

61. I cheated on my first husband with a Navy guy. I didn't feel guilty either.

62. Every time I put clothes in the dryer, I got a lecture from First Husband about the virtues of cleaning the lint trap. And I do mean every time.

63. I love Chinese calligraphy.

64. I used to chat on IRC every night 4 years ago. Make it 5.

65. I love my niece and nephew like they were mine.

66. My brother and sister in law are true Christians.

67. I went to my mom's church today and the Pastor was quadraplegic. Very nice man with a strong voice and message. I know I am in pain all the time, but at least I can feel pain.

68. There is a vegan at my mom's church that does not cook her food. She eats all raw foods. Her son's came to visit and they had to cook outside. How. HOW can you NOT cook your food for christsake? That's weird. She's one of those vegans I stay away from.

69. I don't think my mother in law totally approves of me. I get the feeling she thinks Lee could have done better. There is something that you can tell is being thought, but not said.

70. I have a long term memory like nothing else. I, like my mom and Uncle Merv, have memories of being babies. I remember having my diaper changed as well as riding around in the stroller AND of my trip to Arizona when I was two.

71. I used to lie alot. Out of fear.

72. Sometimes I feel like I don't have my space in the house. Spousal very quickly took his space yet I don't know where my space is or what I would do with it.

73. I am very tired all of the time.

74. When I listen to "Little Earthquakes" I feel like I should be outside in the pouring rain, on my knees with my hands outstretched toward the sky.

75. I hate people who brag.

76. I hate it when people think they're better than others.

77. I like most everyone. There is something good to find in everyone.

78. I believe the human race will eventually destroy itself.

79. I hate most Jazz music. It bugs the hell out of me. Hate scat.

80. I like classical and techno.

81. I am fascinated with trashy, dumpy houses.

82. I have smoked pot maybe 5 times in my life, last time being 10 years ago.

83. I have smoked off and on since I was 12. I am currently not smoking.

84. Gay men do not like me.

I'm more open than I thought I was going to be. This diary is forcing me to put myself out there and chance that others will read this. It's scary and fun at that same time. ***Edit on 10-28. I re read all of this and think I'm going to delete the whole thing. Suddenly it's not fun at all.***Another edit. I'm going to leave this fucked up entry.***

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