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Insidesout

November 11, 2002, 3:39 PM

on the 8th day, god created the inner ear. and it was decided that the inner ear would control balance and vomiting

I'm not feeling well. but yet I can sit my ass down here and write another entry. I have no life. I'm trying to create one. It's going ok. Amy's vegetarian organic entree's are very good. They're not quite as good when you're yacking them back up.

Alan Rickman has a certain appeal. He's do-able. I'm watching Harry Potter just to see see him snarl.

spousal is doing the cleaning up at the place I clean once a week since I'm having much trouble standing upright. I truly am the 91 year old lady today. He took The Big Boobowski to my folks place. Gia..I mean Angela, went with him.

I'm worried about taking a class of any kind. I am fearful I can't retain any of the information I'll learn. I think the best way is to go in there and act normal. Not let on that there's anything wrong and don't get too hooked into the fear of not being able to catch on. I've found if I let on any weakness people sink their claws in which perpetuates an ugly cycle. They somehow view themselves above me. example would be volunteering. Bitch face geneticist woman is a real know-it-all and if I let on in any way I was unsure of myself, she'd be all over it, constantly telling me what I should be doing. She tried and I just don't like that. She doesn't do it now. I just don't respond to that.

Work was the same way. If I let on I felt like an idiot, people treated me like I had a below average IQ. I know it's average at best. I've had my share of allowing people to push me around and I've had enough of it. I'm trying not to go overboard and totally the other way, in people's faces. Just trying to be even keel.

Lucretia's having some problems with this dude linking her diary through his website and using her real name. I checked out his webiste a bit. What an ego! What the fuck is up with him? Lucretia has her own site too, other than diaryland. But it is not ego. You can tell she truly enjoys creating her webiste and sharing herself. She creates other sites. His webiste is all about telling everyone how great he is. Poetry. Guitar riffs. Bio. His life. Art.

I shouldn't ...but I am...being negative. I can't help it. My true fault is being judgemental of people who think of themselves as great. I really hate that. I really have no reason to be judgemental. But I can write it and get it over with.

I think I'm going to vomit again. I'll leave you with that thought.


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Tanya McBee Gunby | Create Your Badge