Blessings and prayers to the Pope and Catholic's/Christians. It's sad and very inspiring at the same time.

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So today for the first time I was in contact with my cousins.

My dad has been estranged from his brother, Lee, for 40 years. My dad's other brother, Uncle Mac (Real name Ralph, a name he hated) died in 1992 of an acute asthma attack. He and his wife were prolific smokers. Uncle Mac's wife, Auntie Patty, died about 6 months later. She had diabetes really bad and died the day after I had receieved a check for $50 from her as a gift for Catherine, a newborn.

So anyway, little was known about Uncle Lee, just that his children and he lived in AZ. I was unsure if I should contact the cousins, but remembered in my early twenties dad saying Uncle Mac had told him the cousins wondered if dad would ever be up for meeting them.

The estrangement had to do with money. My dad's first job was working in a saw mill, cleaning out the sawdust from under the large blade. He was 5 and has been working ever since. He had to quit school in the 8th grade in order to work for the family. Lee did not work. Lee was the favorite of the boys and half of the money my dad earned went to Lee. My dad tells this with no bitterness, that's just the way it was. Any job my dad ever had, the money would go to his mother and then she'd hand half over to Lee and this continued. When my dad met my mom at 16, she questioned him about this and my dad's response was: "He's my brother." Even when my dad broke his arm and got money from that accident, he still gave half to Lee.

I think something happened to where my dad had a revelation that when he married my mom, he had her and would have a family one day and Lee was not working and why? My dad told him one day he wasn't going to be giving him money any longer. Lee made up his mind to stop talking to my dad.

So long story even LONGER, I found a paper about 2 weeks ago with just a little info written about my dad's side, just what my mom knew. She had written it out for my dad's twin cousin's.

So then I did an *intellius search because I could find the one cousin, Billy (named after my dad), listed. On *intellius I found one Billy in AZ, paid my $7 and mailed an open ended letter, saying if this was the same Billy with a brother Gary and a sister nicknamed "Cookie", feel free to write me back. I mailed this 3 days ago and yesterday he had tried to get my number (unlisted), got my old cell number and then found Todd's number (my brother). He called and talked to Anne (SIL) and gave her his number, his sister's number, who had her named legally changed to Sissy and I forgot to ask her why. I talked to her today and she gave me Gary's number and I talked to him briefly.

Gary's supposed to send me pictures via email and that was like an hour ago and I'm WAITING! I'm so impatient! I'm dying to know what they look like. We're supposed to do a conference call tomorrow.

The one thing I do remember was that I saw a picture of a young Gary and Cookie sitting on front porch steps and Cookie and I looked an awful lot alike.

So Uncle Lee is still alive and in a nursing home and not doing too good. He has *Parkinsons and also heart trouble. I knew from Uncle Mac he had heart surgeries, double bypass, triple and then quad bypass. My dad has had a quad about 10 years ago.

Sissy said Uncle Lee and her mother, Ruby, divorced. Her mother remarried and had triplets. One of those triplets died at age 9. Hit by a car.

Now my dad, Billy (not William), Uncle Lee and Uncle Mac and two half brothers. One was a real piece of work and don't know his name. Sissy didn't even know about him. Then there was half brother Stanley, who by my dad's account was sort of a jerk. He died a in 95 and had two kids, one died of an OD.

I'm just writing this down so I remember what Sissy told me. I have yet to talk to Billy, the one I wrote to. Sissy said he's at work today.

Gary, Billy, Sissy. Billy, no kids. Sissy has 4, all grown. Gary has two kids and 6 grandkids.

My dad was obviously the youngest. Lee was 14 years old and Uncle Mac was 16 years older. At times my dad lived with Uncle Mac. My dad's father died when my dad was about 3. I think my dad had a very different life than Lee and Uncle Mac.

So anyway, that's all. I feel like shit and am going to take a shower.

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Tanya McBee Gunby | Create Your Badge