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November 16, 2004, 9:17 PM

I had a dream that Lee and I were walking up a hill and I kept asking him to help me and he kept walking away. Eventually I had to lie down on the ground to rest. It was awkward lying down on the side of the street.

Okkkaaay.

The doctor office calls me last week to tell me I'm anemic and my iron levels are really low which could be because I'm not eating meat and then not replacing my viatmin intake or not eating stuff with iron. Not really taking into account that's why I may be so tired. Usually iron makes me sick but this type that she gave me seems to be ok.

We did go into the doctor today and I'm 35CM from pelvic bone to sternum. Whatever that means. I think it means I'm big right now. She's expecting a big baby. I am too just because I'm about the size now that I was when BooBooBee was born.

Great, VH-! has a show on that's going to be From Flab to Fab. Please tell me why this matters? Why is it that you're a much better person skinny than not skinny or stick thin? Why is it that you have to be a hard body to be respected? Looks have always mattered, why does it matter so much now? Maybe it always has. I wonder why people aren't satisfied with living a good life and being good to other people. Why does it have to be so shallow all the time?

VH1 also had a program on that had movie star mom's that had had their baby and then lost weight the week after. Almost to their normal body size. What the fuck is that? I never do that. I never lose weight fast. It takes forever.

Oh well. I think I need to move to a different continent or something.


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