You know, if you read Mystical's entry, that's pretty much my life right now. Coming down the final stretch and it's really difficult. I'm sick of being fat and getting fatter. Sick of being swollen and not sleeping well. I feel bitchy, for the most part.

I'm having a really hard time standing for more than 5 minutes at a time because it causes some serious agony in my lower back. In Mystical's entry, she talks about doing all this chore stuff and that is the one thing I do not do. Everything is a huge effort. Rolling over in bed is a chore. I need a big crane or pancake flipper.

My stomach is not all nice and round. The upper part is fine, but the bottom part is saggy from the other pregnancies. I have that wonderful scandanavian skin that does not bounce back after extreme stretching.

I'd consider a tummy tuck, but that costs money and is surgery that is vain and don't need.

But I still think about it.

NudeABoo is running around. The good part about her is she'll get on underwear shortly and she won't pee on the floor. I'm very appreciative of that fact.

I'm not wearing a bra and I'm seriously considering leaving it off all day. Usually I can't because it's not comfortable to me, but I'm considering it. I'm sure whoever's reading is so happy I'm considering it online. In writing.

I missed a message last week about a couple of litters of kittens that need fostering. It's very difficult not to call back and say "Sure!" I know it's not realistic, but I so want to. The thing is we need money to buy formula and then cat food if there's a mom involved, stuff like that. That's part of this shelter's foster care program. Then you have to feed round the clock, but that I don't mind. I hope when the baby is born and bigger I can do it again. It's hard not to.

I received a really informative email back from a coordinator from the Big Sister's program in our area. What I did is forward it on to the principal asking him if this is something they thought of for the girl at school. If they haven't, is this something they can follow up on? I can do it too, BUT the principal and teacher have direct contact with the mom all the time. I was thinking she'd probably think it odd if some strange parent brought up the whole idea, etc etc. Then I got to thinking about it more. The mom probably wouldn't think anything of it.

My mom said that kids don't get to choose to be here or not, they at least deserve a fair shake. And it's always surprising when that doesn't happen. I can't imagine having a kid and not having that instinct to protect them and want to make a good life for them.

What this girl needs is intensive therapy and good role models. Such a shame. There are kids that are a bad influence that don't have the charisma this girl has. Just think of how it would be if she was positive?

MISERY quiz.

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